Otters - Joy/CheerfulnessMy life is full of so much abundance and I know that I am blessed beyond what I can even comprehend... but, I feel heavy and dark these past several weeks.
Things have been hitting me very hard and I find myself completing the "have to's" and struggling to retain balance. I've neglected time in the forest, writing and obviously - my Sacred Sunday blogging. I don't like slacking off on personal commitments... things that I find joy in and growth. Lately, I am just tired. I'm trying not to beat myself up and at the same time, don't want this current state to become a habit.
October was filled with many lessons in life, death, rebirth, spirit/spirituality... so many questions, answers, pokes from the universe and frustration in what to do with everything... holding space and trying to make sense of any of it... not that anything needs to make senes all at once or right now . The lovely quirks of my mind and lack of patience thrown into to the recipe and... wow, instant Mr Cranky Pants.
I guess a part of me feels a bit lost right now. And thought I know it's just what I am experiencing at the moment, it's difficult to see the whole picture.
I'm going through my belongings and sorting outthings to keep, donate, and discard... simplifying and also thinking ahead for the move next year.
I'm surrounding myself with things that bring me joy and remind me to laugh and not take things so seriously.
It Must Have Happened - Mary Chapin Carpenter
Can't remember looking for something
So hard to find
I can't remember talking to myself
Just like I'd lost my mind
I can't remember rowing towards the moon
Upon a single beam
But it must have happened, yeah
It must have happened
Can't remember learning
How to laugh at catastrophe
I can't remember losing track
Of who I was supposed to be
I can't remember riding flying horses
Toward the golden ring
But it must have happened
Yes it must have happened
'Cause after all baby here I am
With a ring in my pocket
And the moon in my hand
After all baby here I am with you
Can't remember seeing all my hopes
Going up in flames
I can't remember reaching
For the closes thing to dull the pain
I can't remember feeling
I could be healed by a stranger's hand
But it must have happened
Yes it must have happened
'Cause after all baby
Here I am in a bed of roses
With a punch drunk grin
After all baby here I am with you
Can't remember looking for omens
Hoping there was going to be a sign
I can't remember figuring out
The secret was inside me all this time
I can't remember walking without fear
Towards the light you shined
But it must have happened
Yeah it must have happened
And I know it happened
Yes it must have happened
Darling look what happened
Video - Good Mother by Jann Arden
1 comment:
I can relate to your words. I have been tired and off lately too...and yes, I don't want to get sucked into that mode too long either. Perhaps the change of seasons contributes somewhat...as winter is a time when we tend to pull in and spend more in rest mode...I love your photo...so sweet...
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